Recently in Hard-Hitting Political Analysis from the Total Shite News Team Category

LATE-BREAKING HAMSTER ON PIANO NEWS UPDATE

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Hamster Golfing
In addition to making excellent pianists, hamsters often display considerable talent on the golf course.

Longtime readers of Total Shite will know that we have been following the Hamster on a Piano story from day one. Now it seems a new twist has been thrown our way - allegations of hamster abuse directed at the small rodent's owner, who remains unnamed.

Hopefully if these allegations (namely: that the popcorn was buttered, and that butter is bad for small rodents) are true, the owner will be brought to justice. Hamster/piano owner: please come forward and clear the record. Was the popcorn, as per PETA accusations, buttered? Or popcorn au naturele, perhaps? Did you use I Can't Believe It's Not Butter and/or margarine?

The News Team would also appreciate some expert opinions regarding the safety of I Can't Believe It's Not Butter or margarine for hamsters (and salt, personally we can't stand popcorn without salt). And from philosophers and bioethicists: If the popcorn does shorten the hamster's life span, is this offset by any accompanying improvement in quality of life?

Email NOW at totalshtdotcom@gmail.com.

[siren] BREAKING! [siren]

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Drudge Report: Obama Wins, US to Start Bombing Israel Tomorrow
Drudge Report, circa 11:10 PM EST

Fuck you Tony Bler!

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Great Moments in Rock History
July 2003:
Oi Polloi, the famous all-librarian punk band, expresses disappointment in Tony Blair after it is revealed that 10 Downing Street engaged in plagiarism.
Tony Bler Fuck You
Video was Tagged: oi, Music

This BBC guy is terrible at speaking American. (via Joshua Keating at Foreign Policy)

Britney Spears, on the other hand, is awesome at speaking British, and doesn't even work for the BBC:

Video was Tagged: stupid, british, hate, Britney, girlfriend, love, news, web, crazy, arts, advertising, game, mall, performing, spears, commercials, tv, with, short, Entertainment, film, boyfriend, entertainment, trailer, video, accent, jamie, lynn, series, macy, girl, insane

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