Recently in Boring Category

Read anything on Consumerist in the voice of Milton from Office Space. You can start with the below:

I visited this store for the first time. I placed my regular order and when I said "and a Sweet Tea with no ice" I got met with resistance from the cashier and manager. The cashier called over her manager and they spoke in spanish, not english like I was speaking. The manager then said it was $1.69 for the sweet tea even though right above her head it say $1. She claimed it was because I didn't want ice. I stated at every other restaurant I have never been charged 69 cents for "having it my way" without ice. She then pointed to a sign hung on the wall that stated " $1 Sweet Tea with ice only otherwise regular price". First, I never knew Sweet Tea had any other price than $1 and the big sign behind didn't show that. So I then said "Ok, I'll take ice in my drink, 1 ice cube will be enough." She then said it has to be totally full of ice, and then pointed to a different sign that said "$1 Sweet Tea with FULL cup of ice only. Otherwise regular price. No Refills."

You do have to feel sorry for some of these people, particularly this guy, who went through what was practically a second Holocaust (and at McDonald's, which is much less scenic than Europe). Thank God for Consumerist raising awareness about this gentleman's travails. You can donate here.

August 12, 2008, NEVAR 4GET!

Titling a science article something like "Human Speech Traced to Talking Fish" naturally leads to certain expectations. But because science is really fucking boring, such expectations are usually dashed against the rocks pretty quickly. In this case, "talking" apparently means that::

After building a nest for his potential partner, the male midshipman fish calls to nearby females by contracting his swim bladder, the air-filled sac fish use to maintain buoyancy. The sound is a hum, something like a long-winded foghorn. Female midshipman dig it, and they only approach a male's nest if he makes this call.

This, needless to say, is shite. We all knew already that various lesser critters could make noises of many kinds.  An ant once crawled into your humble author's ear and it made a lot of noises--possibly involving a swim bladder--but it would be a stretch to call these noises "talking".